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Be more dog! 🐕😄🥰

So a couple of weeks ago I revealed my new years resolution to try and notice something good in every day. So far, I'm keeping at it! Even though there's been a couple of pretty crappy days, I've managed to find something good. So like yesterday (my normal posting day) I was exhausted, the brain was showing the blue error message (iykyk) and overall I was feeling rather gloomy; even then I was able to see the joy in my dog every time we did, well, anything! Even just letting her out into the garden to do her business in the rain was a cause for a big wagging tail and excited eyes. That's when it hit me. Finding the good in things is what dogs do!  Yes, I know dogs don't really have much to worry about such as paying bills, mortgages, putting food on the table, but they do have an innocence and flair for life that I think us humans need to take on a little more. We teach them tricks and general behaviors, but when we listen to them, they are teaching us so much more!...
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To progesterone or not to progesterone? That is the question

Before you ask, no I'm not morphing into 'the bard', but I do want to see that new Hamnet film! But I digress... Today I wanted to open up about the decision I'm having to make in connection to managing my endometriosis, well it's more of a brain dump really! But then again that's essentially what this blog has been from the start. As you know, I've now found out that I have endometriosis, albeit only stage 1 (mild), and although this is only an incidental finding and not causing me any issues, it is still something to add into the mix and manage. Also, without management it has the potential to progress and start causing problems on top of everything else. The most common method of managing endo is with progesterone, used to help stop periods and slow tissue growth. Infact, I even had the option for a coil to be placed during my laproscopy to start managing it straight away, but it's something I've never really felt comfortable with (the pill has al...
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New years resolutions or just a new perspective?

'New Year New Me' has almost become a conical saying now, it seems almost everyone starts the gym or some new diet / fitness routine to 'improve' themselves and beat off the Christmas binge. This is usually coupled with a resolution or two. Some of these resolutions can actually become a new hobby (I actually managed this 4 years ago when mine was to start boxercise at the local gym, it became one of my favorite parts of my week and actually introduced me to a very helpful form of stress relief and finally forming a good fitness routine, but I digress...!) but, let's be honest, 99% of them are usually forgotten within the first few weeks as we settle back into familiar routines despite the good intentions.  This year I'm trying to do a repeat of my 'boxercise' resolution in that I'm trying to make one and make it stick! I decided it needed to be something that was achievable even on my more rubbishy days, so nothing super strenuous or unachievable at...
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2025 meet 2026, the year for positive steps forward (hopefully!)

So here we are! 2026! Feels like 2025 was a 'blink and you'll miss it, but it also felt like a big year in many ways. Started the year with a new diagnosis of 'Gut Brain Disconnect' (GBD) ringing in my ears and not really understanding it; ending the year with a much better understanding, a deeper diagnosis under the GBD umbrella (of centrally mediated abdominal pain syndrome) and with a blog dedicated to my ongoing recovery - whilst also trying to spread and increase the awareness around GBD. So here's hoping 2026 is the year for major change and getting back to me! There's a lot of different treatments on my horizons, including the start of my gut-lead hypnotherapy in February, which I'm really looking forward to and (fingers crossed) seeing the positive impact it will have. I will, of course , be blogging about this when it starts!  I do feel the biggest change from this time last year is my perspective on everything; for one i actually have an understand...
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The Ghost of Christmas Obligations

Carrying on with the current christmas theme, another less talked about aspect for this time of year is seeing family or distant friends that you tend to, not avoid, but just not see for your own personal wellbeing. Yes everyone talks about the chaos that can be Christmas day, with some family gatherings feeling more like an episode of EastEnders; but what I'm referring to is the pre or post Christmas day visits that I'm sure most people must have. These visits come out of the feeling that 'its that time of year' and the pang of guilt that comes along with it. Now, you may avoid or not see these people for a very good reason and if it weren't for certain ties or loyalties and 'keeping the peace' you may have cut them off a long time ago, but Christmas has a way of bringing them and the associated guilt of not seeing them to the forefront.  I had my version of this last week, but luckily it went ok aside from a couple of comments and feeling as though I were ...
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'Tis the season to be jolly'

Christmas feels like its racing towards us at an alarming rate! It only feels like 2 seconds since we were basking in a heatwave and now it's rainy, damp and cold with the Christmas decorations up. It's certainly a time of year that can bring up a lot for people, it is also a bit like marmite; you either love it or hate it. For me, Christmas is something that I find myself getting initially excited about but then this turns to dread, anxiety and numbness the closer we get. I've felt this every year for the last 15 years or so and I cant really explain it. As a kid it was super exciting and Christmas was always enjoyable, but at some point this all changed. I don't think I can pinpoint a particular moment for this but I can definitely think of a certain Christmas that was a big turning point. I don't want to go into the details of it, but I  just remember it as being very stressful, with underlying tension and was finished off with a couple of bereavements in the fam...
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'We don't know what else to do'

My last post was all about my anxiety regarding having a laparoscopy, well thankfully that's all done with now and went smoothly! However it seems not all of my anxieties were unfounded over thinking.  Firstly I'll give you the findings; despite not expecting to find anything, we did. Nothing of large concern but it seems I am now a member of the endometriosis club (yay?)! They only found a small amount, so it's easy to conclude that this isn't causing my issues, though it is good to know about and so can now help manage it going forward. The other finding is probably more pertinent to my gut brain issues, this being a very overfull cecum (first part of the large intestine) with it actually lying lower in my body than it should be and entering my pelvic area. I don't know what this means yet, but perhaps it is part of what is causing my pain? Only time will tell!  So which of my anxieties came true? Well, my worries about an overreaction to the procedure were valid ...
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